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For modesty’s sake, she draped Lonsdale’s sport coat over her shoulders and tied her sweater around her waist. Peter’s Basilica, she recalls, she touched the foot of a bronze statue of St. “I asked if God would help me with whatever was happening between me and Joe,” she said, in one of many conversations we had over the past seven months.

“It was like, ‘I don’t quite understand what this is, but please help.’ ”Clougherty and Lonsdale had been dating over the previous couple of weeks, while he was her assigned mentor for an undergraduate course at Stanford called Technology Entrepreneurship, Engineering 145.

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She was a 21-year-old junior at Stanford University, and it was her first trip to Italy.

Lonsdale, then 29, was a Silicon Valley entrepreneur, and he booked a room for them for two nights in a luxury hotel — a converted Renaissance mansion in the shadow of the Pantheon — and arranged a special excursion, with a friend of his who is an architect, to an archaeological site amid the ruins of the Golden House on Palatine Hill, overlooking the Colosseum.

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Under a light gray sky, they stood on plexiglass bridges and looked down at the uncovered remains of what is thought to be a fabled rotating dining room that the Emperor Nero built for extravagant banquets.

Lonsdale is a Roman-history buff, and he told Clougherty about the emperors, praising their civilization and engineering feats.

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